5 Ways To Cultivate Self Love


Comparison must be an ego device, for love makes none... It is established by a lack seen in another, and maintained by searching for, and keeping clear in sight, all lacks it can perceive.


Bodies come in all shapes and sizes, and rarely are they accepted by society/the media. Too many of us are self-conscious and self-critical, and focusing too much on our flaws. The worst thing we can do is make comparisons to and assumptions about ourselves and others. When we judge others, we are really just projecting our own self judgement onto someone else.  We all need to learn to love who we are because we are all unique; there is no perfect body, no perfect person. A Course in Miracles states, judgement is “confused with wisdom, and substitutes for truth.” It is through our perceptions and judgments that we create the world we see around us, whether that be positive or negative. This week I encourage you to start to be intentional about seeing yourself and others through the lens of compassion, love and non-judgement.

Here are five ways to help you learn to love yourself more, no matter what!

1.     Stop Comparing Yourself to Others:

The most important thing you can do to start loving yourself is to stop comparing your body or your habits to someone else’s. Comparisons only lead to self deprecation, jealousy and envy. You will never be happy with yourself if you constantly compare yourself to everyone else. Everyone has flaws, even they are not visible to you. We were all made differently and every body has its beauty. We all also have an internal dialogue. You have no idea what mean things that other person is probably saying to themselves. Our self talk can be real bitches!


2.     Change how you perceive yourself:

In order to love yourself, you must change your perception of yourself. Say positive things about your body and keep saying them until you actually start believing every word. The proof that this works is because this practice is how you started to dislike your body in the first place; you kept seeing yourself in a negative light (or hearing it from other people or media) and finding the flaws until you started believing every thought. Turn that process around and start finding the positive.

Create a daily ritual of journaling positive statements about yourself to yourself. Abraham calls this a list of “positve aspects.”


3.     Go to the gym/start moving more:

Or the park, a dance class, a yoga class, or an exercise class. Physical activity is a great way to learn to love your body. Trying new exercises or taking on a physical challenge helps you get to know your body in a whole new way. You will discover new abilities, new strengths, and new power, just by moving your body. When you see yourself, you will also start to see just what you are capable of, instead of what you look like.


4.     Practice gratitude:

Remember…It can always be worse. Be grateful that you are healthy and that you have the resources or mental clarity to pursue something different. Be thankful for what you have, what you can do, and how far you can go.

This can also be incorporated into your list of positive aspects.


5.     Be your own cheerleader:

When you look in the mirror, do not focus on the flaws. Find the things you love about your body, and celebrate the smallest victories. Be your own cheerleader instead of your worst enemy.

Before you can move forward in life, whether it is in a relationship, a job, or a new endeavor, success will only come after you learn to love and appreciate yourself. As with anything else, big change comes from small shifts. You can do this! If you would like support on this journey I am here for you. Feel free to email me for personal support.

Join me on my Facebook page,facebook.com/drlaramay,  as well as Instagram & Twitter @drlaramay. Also, be sure to tune into my podcast on your favorite platform, iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher, Podbean or Anchor.Fm @Light Body Radio to get all the juicy info coming your way in a easily digestible format. I look forward to hearing your feedback, comments and suggestions.




-   Dr. Lara

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